


cough up some diamonds (shouldn't have bought that corgi)

by Yeehaw Casualty Insurance Company (maureen_corpse)



Category: The Royal Romance (Visual Novel), the royal heir (visual novel)
Genre: Artificial Insemination, F/F, Non-Explicit Sex, canon dependent, chinese-genovian political science professor, not canon compliant BUT canon isn't canon compliant either, this fic brought to you by incognito mode google searches
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-11
Updated: 2019-08-11
Packaged: 2020-08-19 09:49:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20207740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maureen_corpse/pseuds/Yeehaw%20Casualty%20Insurance%20Company
Summary: Have an honest conversation with Hana about your feelings, and she'll do whatever she can to make you feel better—and improve your chances of conceiving the royal heir.(Talk about your nerves with Hana! 30💎)(Just get it over with.)





	cough up some diamonds (shouldn't have bought that corgi)

**Author's Note:**

> Full disclosure: I don't know ANYTHING about ANYTHING and I just hope we all have a good time here.
> 
> Also, this is more sex-adjacent than I expected even though I knew exactly what I was getting into, so be warned: sexy stuff is not an area I practice writing much.

Riley checked her phone for what had to be the tenth time in the past hour. It told her again what it already had several times. She finally placed it face-down on the bedside table and stared down at it.

“This is it,” she said. “The window is open. And so shall be my legs.” Nope. The joke didn't land. She wanted to start pacing.

“Are you nervous?”

Riley turned around to see Hana standing in the doorway. She was smiling but making no move to enter and hurry things along. Riley thought about promising that she wasn't nervous and getting it over with, but Hana was her wife. They were supposed to be able share things with one another, no matter how silly or inconvenient.

“I’m so nervous. Somehow I'm a million times more nervous than I was on our wedding day,” Riley confessed. “It sounds ridiculous. We're safe now, and we're married, and we have nothing to worry about. And there's a nitrogen tank of Chinese-Genovian political science professor sperm staring right at me.” Riley glanced at the tank and then looked away, back at Hana's face.

“Hey.” Hana entered the room and glided across the floor to Riley. “It's not ridiculous.” She took Riley's hands in hers. “We didn't exactly have many opportunities to be nervous on our wedding day. I'm glad things have calmed down enough that we _can_ be nervous about this.”

“You're nervous, too?” Riley asked hopefully.

“Extremely. We're trying to conceive the next heir to the throne of Cordonia! And this isn't the hard part! We have to raise someone who will be a worthy successor to Liam.” Hana squeezed Riley's hands.

“And the whole time we have to fend off Cordonia's neighbors who haven't made it into even the nineteenth century where you don't arrange marriages for people who are barely twinkles in their parents’ eyes,” Riley muttered.

Hana laughed. “We have a lot to worry about.”

Riley took a deep breath. “I think if we're nervous together, I can handle it.”

Hana smiled. “Me too.” Then a telltale glint entered Hana's eye. “You know, a lot of the literature does say that having an orgasm can help increase your odds of success.”

“Hmm, I think I read that, too.” Riley pulled Hana close. “Why don't you tell me more about that step of the process?”

Hana responded with just one tragically chaste kiss to Riley's lips. “You go lie down while I get everything ready, and I'll share all my knowledge and wisdom with you.”

“As you wish, your grace.” Riley knew she was in good hands. She let Hana out of her grasp and turned to the bed. Getting it ready was easy; she swept the massive, old, irreplaceable Valtorian quilt well out of the way, selected some pillows to place roughly where she thought her hips would end up, and covered ground zero with a modern and replaceable Valtorian towel that was also, for some reason, massive.

She had really come a long way since waiting tables in New York.

Now Riley shed her clothes a little more unceremoniously than she had originally planned and got herself into position on the bed. Since she was now luxuriating in a world of pillows under and around her head, her best view of was of the ceiling, and she waited, staring up at it and twiddling her thumbs and trying to clear her mind of anything not relaxing.

Soft footsteps crossed the room, and objects plunked gently on the bedside table.

“Wow, look at you,” Hana said softly.

“Like what you see?” Riley asked. She could just see Hana's appreciative face over the pillows 

“Always.” Hana took a breath. “All right, we have to wait for this to thaw, so I'm setting a timer on your phone. We'll have that long to get you…close.”

“How long is that?” Riley asked.

“I think I'll keep you in suspense.”

“I'm feeling nervous for a different reason now.”

Riley felt the mattress shift as Hana joined her on the bed. She pushed herself up on one elbow to grin at her wife and was treated to the sight of Hana in lacy red lingerie crawling toward her.

It felt like being punched right in the sternum with the prologue to the best adult film humankind had ever dreamed of. (Riley and Hana being the only members of humankind permitted to dream of that adult film, of course.) That wasn't the underwear you wore for a quick artificial insemination followed by binge-watching _Law & Order: Cordonia_. That wasn't remotely what Hana had dressed for.

Riley fell back among the pillows and closed her eyes. She had thought they had a restrictive time limit at first, but now she was worried they had a lot of time to fill. “You planned this, didn't you?” she asked.

“I prepared for this possibility,” Hana said.

“You're a regular Boy Scout.”

Riley felt Hana throw a leg over her and straddle her waist.

“Eyes open, Riley.”

Riley screwed her courage to the sticking place. “As your grace commands.” She opened her eyes and groaned at the sight of Hana above her. “Oh, no. This is how I die, Hana.”

Hana laughed and shook her head. “Not yet!” She glanced at the bedside table. “We still have some time. Then you get a _little_ death.”

“Whatever you say,” Riley agreed.

But by the time her phone started playing Cordonia's national anthem to tell Hana that the vial she had selected had thawed, Riley was ready to rebel.

“That's my cue!” Hana said cheerfully, ignoring Riley's distress completely as she hopped off the bed.

“Hana, don't stop!” Riley cried. “Come back!”

“This won't take long!” Hana said from across the barrier of pillows. “Just—maintain for right now, all right?”

Having a lot of fancy pillows on the giant bed sounded cool until situations like this one arose. Riley couldn't see Hana or what she was doing. Though perhaps that was best; she wasn't worrying about things like vials and thawing. Just _maintaining_.

“_Maintain_!” Riley grumbled. She rocketed a hand between her legs and closed her eyes. “I've been betrayed by my own wife. She turned sex into a timed Olympic event.”

Hana returned soon, however, and innocently kissed Riley's knee. “Are you ready for me to insert the syringe, Riley?” she asked.

“It would be sexier if you asked me if you could ‘stick it in,’” Riley answered.

“Riley.”

“_Yes_, Hana,” Riley huffed out. She kept her eyes screwed shut and focused on the return of Hana's touch. She wasn't so sold on the syringe, but it did outrank some of her life experiences by a lot.

“Ready?” Hana asked again.

“Inseminate me, your grace,” Riley said with her most serious face on, eyes still closed.

Hana stifled a giggle and—Riley assumed—pushed the syringe's plunger down.

“There!” Hana said. She dropped the syringe on the bedside table and shoved Riley's hand away. “Time to finish what I started.”

**Author's Note:**

> Things I have learned from writing this:
> 
> 1) Writing your second draft on your phone (from hand-written scribbles after you were dissatisfied with the Choices update) is aggravating and not conducive to the Writing Process, actually
> 
> 2) I have to keep stretching all my writing muscles no matter how much I don't like learning stuff or practicing things.
> 
> 3) Titles? I don't know her.


End file.
